I've been trying to get to Southeast Asia for a couple years now since I'd heard so many backpackers rave about it while I was in Australia, but unfortunately I kept being deterred by stupid things like logistics and money. However, this year I decided since Lewis was finishing school and I was quitting my job, this might be the best opportunity to go for a couple of months. You never know when some kind of terrible lifetime commitment like a career or a house (and let's not even get started on small humans) is going to sneak up on you and ruin your travel plans forever. Plus, it's a super cheap destination, so I only had to save about 2000 pounds not including flights.
Since Bangkok is the biggest city to fly into out of the places we were planning to see, that's where we started our trip. It also helped that Lewis used to work with somebody at Electric Avenue (the bar where we met in Wellington) before my days there who now lives in Bangkok. He's an American named Ash and he is one of my new favorite people. Aside from being generally awesome, he also put us up in his house for a week, showed us around the city, and basically made our lives super easy since he speaks decent Thai and could communicate with locals for us. I think he summed up Bangkok best when he told us it's a great city to live in if you're ok with being confused most of the time.
Day 1 Settling In
Luckily we had given ourselves more than enough time to relax in Bangkok before beginning to travel around, because after a 7 or something hour flight with Etihad from Edinburgh to Abu Dhabi followed by a flight of almost the same length from there to Bangkok, all I wanted to do was crash. I actually had no real concept of how much time had passed since we'd traveled forward through so many time zones and eaten two meals on each flight, but I knew that I was exhausted.
After getting through Thai immigration, we took the train from the airport to Phaya Thai station where Ash came to meet us. He got us a tuk tuk back to his house, and it was my first ever ride in one! I so prefer it to a taxi. You can feel the chaos of the city while you're trundling down the road in a tiny open-air cart (and it's not like the normal taxis generally have working seatbelts anyway- literally there will be a decorative seatbelt with nowhere to buckle it - so the safety difference isn't all that extreme). The only upside to taxis is they have meters, but you can negotiate a price with your tuk tuk driver before you get in.
Ash lives in a four story house in the old area of Bangkok, just near the Rama VIII bridge. It's a pretty spacious place. Although there are eight bedrooms, he currently only has three roommates, so we got a room to ourselves on the third floor. It had air-conditioning and the bed was comfy, so aside from a leaking ceiling, it was perfect.
The shower only has cold water, but when it's almost 90 degrees every day, that is no problem at all. One thing I did find weird is that you can't throw toilet paper into the toilet. The pipes are too small around SE Asia, and it will cause them to block up. However, most people just use the water gun instead of toilet paper anyway, but I suppose that's down to weird personal preference.
There's a living room area on the second floor, and outside the fourth floor is a nice terrace where you can sit and drink overlooking the city. You can also climb up to the roof from the staircase there and see the bridge.
After the tour, our first order of business was showering, then I immediately laid down intending to take a short nap. It was about 10 AM, but when I opened my eyes again, it had magically become 4 in the afternoon! Like I said, it was good that we had allotted ourselves plenty of time in Bangkok, because I totally wasn't worried about using the first day for sleep.
When we woke up, we went down the road with Ash to the 7/11 on the corner (7/11s are everywhere!) to pick up some beers and ice, then we had a few drinks on the terrace. Ice in beer may sound weird, but unless you want warm beer after being in the sun for a few minutes, it's a fantastic idea. I also took this opportunity to finally dye my hair green (temporarily) since who knows when I'll have a few months of unemployment again?
Later in the evening, Ash took us to his favorite Thai restaurant just a few blocks away. It was pouring rain, but they set up our table out on the sidewalk with an umbrella. Ash took charge of ordering for us (the first time I've ever let a man choose my meal) and made sure a few of the dishes were vegetarian. This was probably the most surprising thing to me in Asia. I had totally expected tons of vegetarian options, but apparently I was confusing Thailand with India, because finding a dish without meat is a serious task, especially when nobody speaks English. They may nod when you say "vegetarian", but then they'll throw some chicken in anyway. This is why Ash was a lifesaver.
We ended up with about eight different dishes including a spicy mango noodle salad and some spinach and veggie dishes that I could eat, plus we got a bottle of Regency. Ordering Thai liquor is super cheap, and most people just get a bottle for the table. This one is a Thai brandy and was surprisingly good! We had this huge table full of food plus a bottle of alcohol and each only paid about 300 baht, the equivalent of 10 bucks. And that is an expensive meal in Thailand.
Day 2 Grand Palace & Khao San Road
We started off our second day by taking a boat across the river (which is totally unnecessary if you just want to walk across the bridge, but it's so cheap anyway). Once we got to the opposite bank, Ash asked if we wanted to see something totally disgusting. He went and bought a bag of bread from one of the ladies on the pier, took a handful, and threw it over the side. The river immediately erupted in gigantic, flapping fish, all right on top of one another flailing their way towards the surface. Moved to the other side and the same thing happened. They must be packed in there like three feet deep! It's a sacred site so fishing isn't allowed, but I'm surprised those things have enough water to breathe. It was indeed pretty disgusting.
I got an unbelievable vanilla iced latte at a little cafe, and I really have to rave about ALL of the iced drinks I had in Thailand. Iced coffees and iced teas are just unbelievable. There are drink and smoothie places everywhere, so it takes some serious willpower not to just spend all your money on amazing 20 baht drinks.
We went down some sheltered alleyway full of shops for breakfast from a street stall. Ash ordered me my first ever veggie "pad see ew" and it was so freaking delicious. I could eat noodles every day (but ask me again after two months during which I likely will have no choice in the matter).
We got a tuk tuk afterwards to Grand Palace, and Ash left us for a couple hours so we could go in and check it off the tourist list. It's 500 baht to get in which is about $15, but it's likely the most expensive tourist activity you'll pay for in Bangkok.
The other unfortunate thing about the Grand Palace is that there's a very strict dress code. Legs must be covered, shoulders must be covered... you have to dress conservatively, and that's even less fun than usual when the humidity is suffocating. I had a long skirt with me which was helpful, but having to put on a long sleeve shirt was miserable (I didn't bring any t-shirts). I drank about two full bottles of water just during the next hour and a half. The only bright side was that flip flops were allowed.
The Grand Palace is worth it though. It's a courtyard full of elaborate temples, each of them totally gorgeous. There are Buddha statues, jeweled pillars, golden domes, gleaming spires, animal statues, and awesome views from every angle.
My favorite was one temple in the center where you can remove your shoes and go inside to the golden shrine. The perimeter of it was lined in Buddhas and it had the prettiest detailing.
After leaving the courtyard, you can see the actual palace where the kings used to reside. The current monarch doesn't actually live there, but it's still used for royal events. There are expressionless Thai guards standing watch, an armory you can walk around, and a green lawn with cool spherical trees.
I was very glad to change back into a tank top after leaving the Palace. We found Ash across the road and all headed to Khao San. This road is infamous for debauchery and partying (mostly among Westerners), but during the daytime it's just full of street stalls.
I wanted a pair of comfy elephant pants because they are lightweight, look awesome, and will protect my legs from the terrifying disease-ridden mosquitoes while preserving my stash of Deet. I got a pair of white and teal ones the first day, and I later went back and got a pair of black and lime green gypsy ones as well. I look like a tourist, but that's already obvious, so why fight it?
After browsing the shops, Ash took us to a place for our first Thai massage. We each paid 500 baht for a full hour deep tissue massage. We removed our shoes, then they took us upstairs where they washed our feet, gave us a sheet to wrap up in after we changed out of our clothes, and put us all in the same room on beds next to each other.
I love massages, but I seriously thought this woman was trying to kill me. Her elbow was digging so hard into my shoulders that every time she rubbed over my spinal cord I thought it was the end. I kept flinching and she kept asking if everything was ok as if she was really going to understand me if I voiced my concerns over maintaining functionality in my legs.
Luckily, once she moved on to my arms, legs, and feet, it was much better. Eventually I flipped onto my back and she did everything from that side, although I was seriously struggling not to laugh while she massaged my stomach. Finally we sat up and the girls did our necks and head which was easily the best part. Oh, and I know this is Asia, no, this was not a happy ending massage... that would have been an awkward group activity.
We went to a restaurant/hostel called Green House on a neighboring street for dinner. They had all sorts of options aside from Thai, so I ended up with baba ganoush and a Greek salad. Between that and the Buy 2 Get 1 cocktails, I was so full afterwards that I just wanted to go home and sleep, so that's what happened.
Day 3 Siam & Casual Night Out
We had a pretty relaxed day on Wednesday. One of our necessary errands to run in Bangkok was getting our Vietnamese visa sorted, so we took the BTS train to Phloen Chit in the afternoon to apply and pay. That was quick and easy, but we had time to spare afterwards, so we took the train back again two stations to Siam. The trains, by the way, are really simple. There's a map showing the lines and each stop has the correct fare over it (according to the station you are currently in). You just push the button for the right fare amount, drop your coins in the machine, and get your ticket. Going a few stops only costs 20 some baht (like 50 cents).
Siam is a central area full of shopping malls. Parts of Bangkok are not nearly as exotic as you might think, and a lot of shops in the malls are ones you'd find in the US or UK. We basically just wandered around to kill time until Ash got in touch, then we all met up back at the house and walked over to a restaurant called Chomp. It's owned by ex-pats and has an awesome menu, especially for a vegetarian. There were all sorts of fake meat options! I ended up with a veggie hot dog and wedges, and we all had a few cocktails.
A little further down the street is a jazz bar where we spent the rest of the night. It was a cool crowd and there was a great band on which included a saxophonist, guitarist, drummer, and trumpeter. We only had a couple beers, but you could again see how cheap drinking is, because most people just had a bottle of Jack at their table. We'd probably have stayed out longer (especially if it was up to Ash), but Lewis and I were headed to Ayutthaya the next morning and I knew I'd never wake up if I kept drinking.
Day 4 Ayutthaya
This was the absolute best day of my first week in Southeast Asia.
Lewis and I made it to the train station around 9 in the morning and bought a ticket up to Ayutthaya. They'll offer you a choice of air con or not, but Ash had told us to just get a third class ticket, so that's what I bought for 15 baht. There is absolutely no reason to go with air con anyway, because the other coaches still have fans on the ceilings and the windows stay wide open the whole journey letting the breeze cool you down.
The weirdest thing about the trains is that at each stop, merchants hop on and off and walk up and down the aisles trying to sell their wares. Another weird thing is that there's an entire section reserved for monks. I also thought it was odd that we seemed to be sitting at each stop for 10 minutes at a time, and finally around the fourth stop we ended up at a standstill for around 40 minutes. I had no idea what was going on until an attendant came around and had us hop off the train and get onto another one because ours had broken down.
Once we got on the new train, they made us pay another 5 baht because this one was an express train, then I laid my head against the wall and slept for the rest of the trip. It takes about two hours in total to get to Ayutthaya on the slow train (not sure how much shorter the express is), and when we arrived, tuk tuk drivers started swarming the platform trying to offer their full-day services to take you to all of the temples and sights. Thankfully, once again Ash had given us a tip to rent bicycles, so we declined all of the drivers and walked across the street where we had a quick iced coffee and then continued on to the river just another block away.
It was 5 baht each to take the river boat across (a negligible amount of money), and once we reached the other bank after only a minute, we ran into a bike rental just there. It was 50 baht to rent a bicycle for the entire day ($1.50), and they also provided a map and a bike lock. We could have gotten our bikes for 30 baht on the far side of the river, but then it costs another 5 each way to take it onto the boat, so it wasn't worth the hassle just to save 10 baht.
The bike lady circled the best temples on the map, clipped them to our bikes, advised me to put the straps of my backpack around the handlebars so nobody could grab it out of the basket, and we were off. It was so much fun! Ayutthaya is a town full of scattered ruined temples, and every few blocks there's something to pull off the road and see. Plus zooming down the Thai streets was an experience in itself.
Our first stop was at Wat Maha That, this complex of old crumbling brick. It was 50 baht to get in. There were some really cool Buddhist statues as well as the famous statue head embedded in the twisted branches of a tree.
We passed a few temples on the road, but the next notable stop was across a bridge at an intact and still functional temple called Wat Na Phra Men. 20 baht entry. Inside was a gigantic golden Buddha at the end of a line of red and gold pillars. It was extremely impressive! There was a big group of monks in there in their orange robes, and I actually thought it was really funny because they were all taking photos of each other in front of the Buddha. Monks can be tourists too!
We ran into the monks again at the next temple (also 20 baht), which unfortunately I don't recall the name of, but I felt like I was tripping. It was full of chicken statues. Like, everywhere. One Buddhist statue was totally surrounded by dozens and dozens of chickens. Chickens guarding everything. Along with that, all of the Buddha statues seemed to be surrounded by psychedelic, flashing lights. It was bizarre.
I needed water, food, and an escape from the heat after that experience, so Lewis and I stopped on a road with food stalls. Of course, we were on our own now and speak no Thai (aside from Sawadee Ka- hello- and Kop Khun Ka- thank you), so street food was going to be a struggle. I don't want to eat anything that's been sitting out in the sun, but none of the made-to-order stalls really have a menu. I ended up at a safe looking crepe stand where the long-haired guy spoke to me in Thai and all of the schoolgirls standing around waiting for food just laughed at me. I didn't want a chocolate and Oreo crepe, but that is what I got because they were the only ingredients I was able to ask for.
Luckily Lewis had found a restaurant around the corner in the meantime, so once we had our crepes we walked over there for some actual food. The tables were in the shade surrounded by trees, and we had two fans blowing on us which was paradise to cool us down. The menu was also in both English and Thai, so we were able to order without many problems. I just covered the meat options when I showed the waiter and said "vegetables" a bunch of times with exaggerated pointing. It worked out fine for me, but Lewis ended up with something entirely different to what he'd ordered.
Most excitingly, I happened to look over my shoulder near the end of my meal and realized that there was a pet monkey on the premises! He was in a big cage in the corner and had been covering himself with his blanket. He was adorable! I went over to see him and he slowly emerged from his blanket cocoon in the cutest way anyone has ever woken up in history.
THAT FACE.
I reached out to him at one point and he put his little hand right through the bars! Then the lady who worked there came over with our leftover food and fed it to him, and I don't care how many times I've seen monkeys, I'll never get over it.
Then, as if our animal encounters couldn't get any cooler for the day, we hopped back on our bikes and were coming up to the end of a sidewalk when out of nowhere a freaking elephant comes right around the corner. I had to move out of the way for an ELEPHANT. ON THE SIDEWALK.
There's a "sanctuary" in Ayutthaya, and I use that term loosely because they offer elephant rides which is not exactly humane. Of course anyone would love to ride an elephant, but the industry is not a good one and their treatment isn't always the best. There are places where you can have responsible elephant interactions and I plan to visit one, but riding them won't be a part of it. That being said, although it had passengers on its back, seeing an elephant in the middle of town passing literally a yard away from me was crazy.
I had already decided this was a phenomenal day, but we still had one large temple left to see at the very top of town. It was called Wat Chaiwatthanaram and was 50 baht entry. It was pretty spectacular. It almost looked like an old Mayan temple with the large central tower complete with steep staircases on each side.
The sun was starting to go down and I didn't want to be riding our bikes in the dark, so we made our way back to the rental place. It took about 20-30 minutes to get back and involved riding alongside some heavy traffic, so I was happy when Lewis got us back to the place. We returned our bikes, took the river boat back across, and caught a train back around 8.
We were told to get on at Platform 3, but a train pulled up at Platform 1 first and some guy took our tickets and said this was the train to Bangkok. Also, as a side note, you literally just walk right across the train tracks to cross to various platforms. We were confused but got on, and immediately we were stared at all down the train because we were the only white people on it. Apparently we had been meant to wait for the express train and ended up seeing it pass us later, but we got on the slow train by accident and sat with a crazy old Thai man who shouted at us to join him from halfway down the carriage. Two hours later we were back in Bangkok and ready for sleep.
Just as a quick aside, this day is perfect proof of how little money you need in Thailand. To summarize our costs for the day, we paid 50 baht for a bike rental, 10 baht for a round-trip on the boat, 20 baht each way on the train, and 140 baht in total for four temples. Add in about 200 baht for food and water, and we'd still only spent under 500 baht each for an entire amazing day out. That's less than $15.
Day 5 Terminal 21 & Soi Cowboy
Lewis and I had to pick up our passports and new visas from the Vietnamese Embassy on Friday, so afterwards we headed to a shopping mall that Ash had recommended. It's called Terminal 21 and each floor is themed after a different city or country. It's awesome! I'm totally a sucker for any kind of themed establishment, so I loved this. Even the bathrooms matched the theme for each floor and the attendants and doormen were all wearing corresponding outfits.
The bottom floor was Caribbean with a lighthouse, palm trees, and a steel drum sink in the bathroom. Next up was Rome with statues in the pillars, an angel fountain, painted ceilings, piazza signs, and a white circular communal sink in the bathroom.
To continue on upwards, Paris had street lights on the walls, gilded mirrors in the bathroom, and a general classy look. Tokyo was perfect with neon lights everywhere, a giant kitty, sumo pillars, and Japanese lanterns on the ceilings.
London had huge red buses, brick walls, and an amazing bathroom that looked just like an Underground station.
Istanbul had tarps, tassels, chandeliers, mosaic patterns, and a mess of various corridors like a market.
San Francisco actually had two floors, the first as a city street and the second as a pier. There was the Golden Gate Bridge stretched between them. The pier had a big food court with fountains and topiaries, plus bathrooms with cool colored buckets for sinks.
Finally the top floor was the cinema with a big Hollywood sign, an Oscars statue by the escalator, and a bathroom with a red floor, vanity lights above the mirrors, and images of fans all screaming for you as you walk in. I totally loved exploring and spent a couple hours there. I was also beyond excited to see a Coldstone Creamery on the San Francisco floor and had to get some American ice cream. I've got about 50 more photos of this mall, but I'll spare you (unless we're Facebook friends... they're all on there).
Ash met us outside the mall afterwards and took us to a bar called Hemingway's for their happy hour. He had a group of Germans visiting so we all hung out for the night. Once happy hour ended, we got some street food and then headed to Soi Cowboy for a proper Bangkok night out.
Soi Cowboy, the stripper district, is full of neon and there are girls in varying degrees of lingerie outside every bar. I won't go into graphic details of our visit to Suzy Wong's, but to answer the age-old question of whether a girl can fit 20 feet of flowery lei up her vagina, the answer is yes, yes she can.
Ash took us to the gay district after that, and we shared a beer tower in a quiet pub while he was hit on by old Irish men at the bar. An hour or two later and we were racing each other in our tuk tuks to get home.
Day 6 Lumpini Park & Khao San Road
I was not feeling so hot on Saturday and that was not at all helped by the blazing sun. Lewis and I got the BTS to Silom and walked over to Lumpini Park where I had heard there were huge water monitors. It's a very nice park in general actually with statues, playgrounds, and a clock tower.
We sat by the lake and saw a couple of lizards gliding through the water plus a girl feeding a sea turtle that had wandered out, so we decided to pay 20 baht to rent a swan boat and head out on the lake ourselves.
It was a simple pedal boat, and we had a half hour rental. I also bought a bag of bread from a little girl, so we fed the fish along the way. We came across a couple of humongous monitors, like the size of a young crocodile. They were so cool! We followed one along the river bank for awhile. We ended up doing a loop of the lake, returned our boat, and then tossed the rest of the bread over the bridge on the way out to feed a swarm of gigantic fish and ugly catfish. There were some turtles hanging out in an alcove, so I tried to aim as much as I could their way.
We took the train and then a taxi over to Khao San again afterwards and did some market browsing. The biggest difference on Khao San at night is the music blaring out of the bars, food stalls popping up on the streets that are selling tarantulas and scorpions and all variety of bugs, and bar staff trying to lure you into their establishments to inhale nitrous balloons.
Oh, sorry... I'm a vegetarian.
The football was on at a bunch of the bars, and unfortunately you can take your man out of the UK, but football will follow you halfway across the world. We had a good dinner at a place that was showing the match, then we went up to a third story bar called Roof Bar where there was live music. We had a few buckets, our friends met us out, and we ended up at a small hippie bar down an alley called Happy Bar to end the night. Well, end my and Lewis's night anyway. We had a flight to catch in the morning, so we said our goodbyes around 11 and caught a cab back to the house.
Bangkok was not entirely what I expected! It's a strange mix of modern and developing. You can absolutely find the wild, seedy side of the city, but other areas are very pretty and nice. It was a great way to settle into our Asia trip and provide a little base to return to if needed. I mean, I still haven't been to a ping pong show, so I'll have to go back, right?! (Edit: Made it to a ping pong show. Worth every bhat.)